Nov. 18th, 2002

*Sigh*

Nov. 18th, 2002 01:55 am
Oh well. No word still, although they aren't signed on to EQ anymore, so, I know he could of called but didn't.
I want Lenore so badly! It's frustrating. I'm torn between her and Martin. She's so exactly everything I've ever wanted in a person. But she's so beautiful it's intimidating me, because we're both girls, and she looks so "wow" and I look, well, I look like me. But she's perfect! She's artistic, she's smart, she just so happens to be reading the same exact book as me! And I talk to her and she listens. What is a KiKi to do in this situation?
It's obvious that I need to talk to Martin to find out what the hell is going on. That isn't even a possibility until he gets off school tomorrow. But I can't call him, I'm too scared to. My social anxiety seems to be taking control of the situation. Why be with somebody you're afraid to call? There isn't even anything to be afraid of, I'm just afraid to call and hear that he's at Drew's again I guess. I know that the way he's acting isn't normal behavior. Maybe I should call his mom while he's at school, and tell her that I want to just drop all his stuff off at their house. But no, I can't even talk to her about it, or even want to talk to her. She's really cool, but she's also this ultra-hippie lady, and she believes that people are free spirits who should always just do whatever they want, and that there are no rules, and relationships should just be totally chill and relax. She doesn't talk about or acknowledge problems really. She's also never been married, and hasn't had a boyfriend in like 10 years. So we see where that's coming from.
Ugh whatever.
I promise that as soon as I talk to Martin, weither it's over or not, I will be much more chipper. I can handle anything except not knowing. No matter what is wrong, as long as I have information to work with, I'm fine. Does that run in our family Tanya? We're all walking time bombs right? Bottlings stuff up until we hit the age of 45 or 50, then we go crazy put on hockey masks and sit on top of buildings and snipe people off? Oh.... no.. that's just me right?
Actually, if I was REALLY going to kill somebody I'm sure I'd do it in a much more creative manner than sniping. I don't think somebody has the right to take the life of another, unless they are willing to own up to the responsibility of seeing that person die up close and personal. If you can't handle watching or feeling them die, you shouldn't take it upon yourself to kill them.
I'm sorry. You shouldn't kill anybody anyways, that's something we like to call illegal.
Oh my god. What am I rambling about now. Justifiable ways to commit murder? I'm going to shut up now. It's 2am

Yummy!

Nov. 18th, 2002 10:22 am
Yay! I'm happy right now! I slept from around 2:30am till 9:30am, not too bad 7hrs. Then I got up and read some more of the book "Lost" EVERYBODY has to read it. It's such a good book....
And now I'm eating a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Yippee. Oh! You know you have it bad for somebody, when everything you do makes you think about them!! Like, I can't even eat a little peice of candy without thinking of Lenore. (Why does a peanut butter cup make me think of her? Because she's allergic to peanuts. See I'm not crazy! The thought was justfied!)
Ok I'm going to stop with my early morning rambles!

Survey

Nov. 18th, 2002 02:40 pm
Hey people, this was a survey e-mail but I don't know all of your e-mail addys, so I thought I'd post it here too. Feel free to respond in my comments, I'm curious about everybodys' answers



I decided to write one of those online survey thingies. It's kind of weird. Have fun. You all know how to respond to this right? Copy and paste this into a new e-mail, and change my answers to match your own. Then send it out to whoever you wish, including me!!

~*~Basics ~*~

Name : KiKi
Birthday 10/30/81
Astrological Sign : Scorpio. *stings*
Location : Caldwell, ID *wishes it were Pocatello* *pout*
Pets : 6 kitties, 2 doggies, 1 chinchilla, hundreds of sea monkeys

~*~Hobbies~*~

What might we find you doing, if you could pick one thing only to do for the rest of your life : You would find me with a sketch pad and a package of #2 pencils. I would pick to draw for the rest of my life. I could also this way write, by cheating and making the words little pictures (bubble letters, etc)_, so it would still count as drawing. I love to draw, mainly fantasy type pictures, erotica, sometimes comics, hentai, etc.
Listening to Music, reading, art, sports, cooking, put these in the order of how much you like them, the most being first
Art, music/reading tied, cooking, then sports. Depending on the sport, I love swimming, that might have to be in there with music and reading.
Kind of music that dills your pickle : I like a few different kinds of music.. 80's metal, 80's rock, death metal, black metal, grindcore, old punk, Celtic, classical, chants, a little new age, whatever. Even some female jazz vocalists. I just don't really like hip hop, r&b, rap, reggae. I also like some world music, I love Romanian folk music. I like harp music, panpipes, etc.
The question we've all been waiting for.....*drumroll* Favorite food : Well. My all time favorite food is lobster! And mussels. And salmon with lemon pepper. I love sea food. And I love pesto and pine nuts on everything. I love fillet mignon. I love potatos with sour cream and chives, or with cheese and brocolli. Sometimes I put hamburger, cheese, brocolli, and sour cream all on a potato together. mmmm. A heart attack in the making. I love hazelnut gellato. I love chunky honey roasted peanut butter. I LOVE ALL THINGS PUMPKIN
Favorite Authors : Gregory Maguire, Dean Koontz, Janet Fitch, Thomas Harris. Different True Crime authors. V.C Andrews. I could go on
Collect Things : I collect artwork, fairy statues, books, mangas, cds, dvds, *heirlooms*.

~*~Hmmmm~*~

This is the part where I say a word, and you say the first thing that pops to mind

Girl:Boy
Boy:Girl
Cat:Friend
Red:Blood
Book:Lost
Scream:Help
Food:Green
Hungry:No
Depression:Doctor
Knife:Cut
Music:Calm
Play:Young
Art:Beauty
Fairy:Beauty
Fraggle:Rock
Koosh:Mookie
Child:Innocense
Friend:Far
Bob:Jane
Mary:Aura
King:Scorn
Prince:Pauper
Rope:wrists
Bound:Break
Blood:Taste
Lust:Blood
Dissection:Vivisection
Soul:Barren
Healing:Light
Death:Freedom
Happy:Question

Odd collection of words no?

~*~Personal~*~

How's your social life: Sucks right now, hard to meet people in Idaho
Who are your three best friends: Zevah, Jen and Tina, Lenore
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend: I don't know
How long have you been together:
What was your longest relationship: A few years
Straight/gay/bi: I'm honestly starting to think I'm just a lesbian, I clung to the idea of being bi, but I honestly don't think I'm physically attracted to men, the mental connection can be there, but I'm not really honestly sexually interested. Then again every guy I've been with is sexually selfish, so who knows anymore?
At what age did you lose your virginity: 14
Do you regret it: I've regretted a lot of sexual encounters, but not that one RIP Larry Micheal McNay 1980-1996
Ever been arrested: Yes (IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I HONESTLY PROMISE), arson, when I was 12, bonfire got out of control
Handcuffed: heh
Hurt somebody on purpose: Physically, I've been in a fight, but no intentional emotional damage to people I care about
Been in a fight: yes
Stolen from a friend: no
Put down a friend to make yourself feel better: no
Go to college: Midst of it
What did you major in: Going for Sociology/Admin Justice
Do you love this survey: Sure why not

Any last words for the person who sent this to you: I just made it, so no

Profile

velvetechos

February 2016

S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
141516171819 20
21222324252627
2829     

Most Popular Tags

Page Summary

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Aug. 15th, 2025 06:50 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios