Monday Blahs?

[velvetechos]

Due to taking a million psychology classes I've given myself license to diagnose myself as clinically insane. Walking around in day to day life I see myself acting abnormal on emotional and mental levels, and I'm able to reason with myself, and tell myself to knock it off, but I can't stop myself, even when I'm arguing in my own brain. Not multiple personalities, just arguing with myself.
Is it really quite normal to go off on an angry depressed psychotic rant, then run out to the nearest Wal-Mart and stock up on Christmas decorations? Somebody just shoot me already, because I've turned into the demented Martha Stewart. Oh don't worry everybody. No reason to frown. We've got fuckin glowing candy canes to put up!

Comments

[werejackal.livejournal.com]

Are you kidding? Do you know how much money Martha Stewart makes? And if you try to tell me she doesn't go on an angry depressed psychotic rant before handcrafting a wreath out of fall colour leaves from her own garden or putting up her $8 mil Christmas light display, I will heap scorn!

Plus I bet she doesn't have glowing candy canes.

Are you allowed to diagnose yourself? More importantly, can you prescribe medication to yourself? I'm, uh, just asking.

[velvetechos.livejournal.com]

I think I'm allowed to diagnose myself due to the fact that nobody can stop me from thinking and coming to conclusions. =-) If I could prescribe meds to myself though.... oh glory days.. I think I'd be in a blissfully sedated state at the moment. Instead I am glaring at a bottle of Godiva chocolate liqueurr and pondering drinking it, though I won't because I'm anal retentive, and I keep telling myself I WILL NOT drink the liqueur because there isn't a Godiva store in Idaho to my knowledge, and I must keep the bottle partially full until I go back to the abyss we call Sillycon valley and buy some more.
Ok. I don't know how I got onto that subject.
Well anyways. Martha Stewart is crazy we all know that. She braids these wreaths to keep herself from ripping out the throat of everybody around her. Like in the movie Idle Hands. As long as her hands aren't free, she can't cause damage.

Hehehehe Crazy Girlie

[(Anonymous)]

Well My darling Kiki , I think we are all clinically insane in our own cute little non violent way. Well most non violent.
Love ya sis, your Chris (Christina)

[two1361.livejournal.com]

It's all ok!! How's this for insane:

All of my towels match my shower curtain. Dark green, light green, and cream. My shower curtain also matches the covers for the toilet seat, and the rug on the floor.

Then, in my living room, everything is either black, or the same shade of burgundy and dark blue. And I mean everything, the candles, the curtains, the rugs, the pillows...I am the color queen!

That's insane, my dearest. You're just cute. : )

Touche' Touche'

[velvetechos.livejournal.com]

Aye, but in my two bathrooms, the toilet seat, curtain, throw rug, toothbrush holder, garbage can, and soap dispensers all match (in their respective bathrooms, not that both bathrooms are alike). In my living room everything matches as well, all of the tables have cherry wood finish, and the curtains are the same color as my painting frames, and the couch is one shade darker than the rug. I have fake flowers in matching vases, and all the curtains in the entire house are black.
Not so cute anymore am I?

You win.

[werejackal.livejournal.com]

I have dogs. I gave up, long ago, ever having anything nice and/or matching. However, everything in my kitchen has fish on it, including my black fish-skeleton trivets. Does that count for anything?

Re: You win.

[velvetechos.livejournal.com]

Even worse, I have 2 dogs, 4 cats, a chinchilla, and some sea monkeys, and I still keep everything obsessively clean. *cries* I will not give up on having the cleanest house out here, no matter how many animals there are!! Messes seem to cause me to spiral downwards into deep depression. Not sure why. I get mopey and frustrated

[sed.livejournal.com]

if it's the Caldwell one I used to work there.



*shudder*


*curls up and hides*

[velvetechos.livejournal.com]

Yep, I'm sorry girlie, it is indeed *big loud booming stereo voice* THE CALDWELL WAL*MART *end of stereo voice* The creepy place, only two blocks from my house, where I make my 2am runs for cheesecake and bathrobes. Ahem.. well.

[sed.livejournal.com]

HOLY McFUCK NO!!!! AAUUUGGGHHH!!


Heh :)

Cheesecake sounds good. 'Specially topped w/ cherry :)

[werejackal.livejournal.com]

I hate to break this to you, but you know what sea monkeys are, right?

Tasty, is what they are. 'Specially drizzled with red wine and garlic butter. Mmm!

See, you have a chinchilla. This just feeds your problem. What do chinchillas do to clean themselves? Roll in dust, right? That can't be conducive to a clean household. Do what I do: get snakes. I love my snakes. They don't shed fur, cough up hairballs on the sofa, chew stuff, poo on the rug, or... well... much of anything really.

Damn, snakes are boring! I think I'm going to go get a chinchilla. Maybe stop at the market and get a carton of Kung Pao Sea Monkey for supper...

[velvetechos.livejournal.com]

Sea monkeys are pretty closely related to brine shrimp, heh, yes I know this. But they're cute. They get fairly large, about pinkie nail sized, so you can see their eyes and stuff. Kind of look like little aliens. Here everybody, have a close-up look at a sea monkey, go to http://users.uniserve.com/~sbarclay/science.htm
It's really interesting. I know, I know it's sick for me to be looking up sea monkeys online.